They set a fire in the woods and watched the fucker burn

House stuff is moving along nicely. There were some jitters early on (What if it's not big enough? What if a missile hits it? What if we just decide we hate it? etc. etc. etc.) but I think those are mostly because I'm dropping all of my non-401K savings on down payment. It's scary, I guess, because it's like a money-reboot. I've been thinking a lot about how nice it will be that it's our house and we can do whatever we want with it (Erin is more excited about this, though, I think). We already have a kind of extensive list...

1) Gutters -- this house has no gutters. We would also like to install a rain barrel of some sort to collect the rain water and use for watering the yard/whatever.
2) Closets -- we want to install some sort of modular closet system. I think we're leaning toward elfa because, despite the cost, they have tons of reconfigurable things we could use if we wanted to "remodel" it.
3) Closet doors -- the closets have hinged doors that don't really fit in their tracks very well. Besides taking up floor space with door swing space, I think they just kind of look bad. We're going to put some IKEA Kvartal sliding panels up instead.

I have really slowed my running down (I still try to go once a week or so) just because I don't want to turn into a skeleton. I'm down to the low 150s in terms of weight and I'm afraid I might be a bit bony. I still stuff myself about once a week (or more) but my body has just turned into a furnace, I guess. I haven't been skating or swimming since my last post (got cold/rainy again). Erin is busy and Kerstan will be out of town this weekend, so I won't be doing much there this weekend either.

Cause I'm a man, not a boy, and there are things you can't avoid, you have to face them when you're not prepared to face them

I feel like I'm getting much older all of a sudden.

I have held off on posting about this but I think now is a good time. Erin and I are trying to buy a house. This is terrifying. We have our eyes set on one and are in the negotiating phase of it. It's an older house (originally built in 1945 but has been updated) but it has a lot of things we really love. It is a really small house (~1250 sq. feet) but has a great livable layout. There is almost no wasted space. 3 bedrooms and 2 bath, living/dining room and a kitchen. The garage is in the back and it's HUGE. PERFECT for a work shop. There is a fenced in side yard with a small doggie door already installed (we would want to install a slightly larger one when we wind up getting a dog). There is tons of concrete in the backyard, so I can actually skate back there a bit and not worry about getting kicked out or anything. It does back up to Mopac, but that is a blessing and a curse, I guess -- we can be a bit louder (which is perfect for me) but the sound might take some getting used to.

There are some issues we need to get addressed and still need to investigate namely:
1) The foundation has been worked on recently, but we're not 100% certain that it was done correctly. There is a warranty on that work, so we will need to discuss with the person who did it and figure some stuff out.
2) The plumbing has some smallish leaks and water pressure to the master bath was miserable during the inspection. We need to have a plumber look at it.
3) Electrical system has some issues. Everything works, but there are some hazards. Outlets that should be grounded aren't, and some issues with the recessed can-lighting.
4) The furnace and water heater have issues with ventilation pipes being too close to combustibles.

We have put in a request that the seller address these issues. If he does, we will be buying the place. Erin and I seem to be going through phases...we're really excited one day, then really worried the next, and repeat. We just don't want to wind up making a really expensive mistake.

Other growing up news:
-Erin and I now share a cell phone plan. I added her to my plan and we ported her number and everything...so it's like we're married.
-Erin is going to be graduating soon. She might not find a job with her degree, so she's planning to get teacher certification over the summer and teach until she finds something.

Resisting growing up:
-I went skating and swimming the past 2 saturdays in a row. My legs look like I pissed off Tonya Harding. I believe the bulge on the side of your ankle (on the inside) is the knob at the end of the tibia (Amber? A little help here?) but my left leg had 2 extras along the inside of my leg and another extra one on the inside of my right leg for a couple days that were actually bigger than the ankle bulge itself =\
-Also rock climbing on this past Saturday. It kicked my ass, despite being a relatively easy climb (I think). I guess it is technically over vertical, so it's not the easiest...but we could fall into the water, so there was no fear of hurt.

I was gonna bring her apples when she was in need

I haven't talked about anything very serious in a long time...maybe I won't finish this post and maybe I won't get out everything I want to, but I think I want to try.

There have been a couple of cases in recent times (one had charges announced just recently, another was a year or two ago) in which "cyber bullying" is blamed for a person's suicide. This is a very complicated sort of situation for me. I've been on many sides of this issue at different times -- I will admit that I've been a bully at times and I've definitely been bullied.

I love the freedom that the internet gives people, but at the same time, I think that it causes a sort of magnification of force. When I was bullied as a kid at school and I would take that home with me to some degree, but at least I had some sort of reprieve. When I became online-aware, I was able to use the internet as a sort of release -- I found it to be a soothing way to connect with people in a way that I was almost totally incapable in meat space. However, the internet was very different back then; I chose who I would connect with. I had to give my information out to other people. Sure, someone could email me or IM me, but I could block or filter those messages and I could just get rid of them fairly easily. No one saw the contact except for me. In this age of facebook and myspace and whatever, there seems to be far more opportunities to just search for someone by name and find their little corner of the web.

I don't think the internet is to blame. I also don't think bullying in and of itself is to blame either. Most opponents of laws to punish those who bully kids to the point of suicide take up one or the other of these points. This is a fairly new phenomenon -- in the past internet communication was more like a phone call and less like a Google search. Bullying has gone on probably as long as people have been around. However, they really only get incredibly dangerous when they are used together.

I think the point I'm trying to make is that I'm confused about what should be done legally about this. Now that I'm a bit older, I can easily see that the bullying was so completely pett -- but back when I was the target/perpetrator, it really mattered. How exactly do you draw the line? There have been 5 year olds sent home from school for making finger guns in class -- zero tolerance almost always seems like overkill, but when you allow things to get tinged with gray, nothing ever seems to get done.

I guess I'm just really bummed that there are people who will never get to grow up and realize that what they were going through will really just not matter at all later. In some ways, I think the bullies in these cases will probably wind up punishing themselves enough. I know that if someone I had bullied wound up killing him/herself, I would probably have just fizzled out. On the other hand, though, people do stupid shit all the time and don't care.

Tiny pies

Erin made some pies like this:
http://www.notmartha.org/tomake/piesbakedintinyjars/
They were tasty. She made apple and peach filling from scratch (my two favorite baked goods flavors). She used a different recipe, but this one illustrates the idea just fine. She only made 4 just in case they sucked, but they turned out great. I can't wait to eat more.

I've been thinking about skating a lot lately. I even dream about it. I really really want to get kickflips down (every time I've gotten them pretty decently down something has happened that stopped me from skating for a couple years). I'd also like to try to learn nose/tailslides and perhaps bluntslides, but those will (hopefully) come later. I'm cleaning up my frontside 180s and should probably try to get backside 180s as well as just general switch skating down a bit better/more comfortably.

It's weird to receive a compliment from someone about the way you sang Amazing Grace at their husband's funeral. Better than a complaint, I suppose.

bzz

I've started using Google's Buzz. I've liked most things Google has come up with/bought, so I figured I'd try it. If it sucks, I'll shut it down. I might use that more than this, though...I think you can find it here: my buzz

Oh no! He's going to hurt my legs!

I finished* my guitar last weekend. I'm not 100% happy with it. The nut that I cut is cut a little too deep (which causes a little fret buzz when the low E is played open), the pickguard doesn't fit the pickup covers as well as I'd like and I'm not certain that I like the pickups I wound for it. I say I'm not certain because they sound okay...but I don't have a decent comparison for them -- I also don't play them through a decent amp. Most of the time, I don't actually even play through an amp at all, actually. The neck feels really good, and it plays in tune about as well as can be expected (it is pretty commonly known that guitars aren't 100% perfect along all frets unless you either use an individual fret for each string or something else that is ultimately WAY too much work for too little gain). I love the colors and the overall look of it -- I'm just worried that I'm too "simple" when it comes to guitars to really be able to rate the guitar very well.

My next projects I'd like to undertake are (with possible time-frames):
cut a new nut -- whenever I get tired of the one I have...maybe tonight
build an amp -- possibly before we move, but maybe not
build a case -- same as the amp. I would probably build an amp first, though. Also, I would build a case because the guitar is odd in its dimensions/shape and I don't want to search for something that will sort of fit.
build a new neck for Erin's dad's guitar -- after Erin and I find a house (probably) I would like to wait until then, at least, just so I'll have a garage to build in. I might see if Kerstan will let me work in his condo's garage, though, if it looks like it will be a long time. Erin's dad's guitar is a Peavey Patriot from the 80s, I would guess, and it needs some fretwork. I could probably re-fret it, but I'm scared of doing that on a decent neck, so I could just build a new one.
new guitar -- I would LOVE to build a archtop hollowbody as my next real experiment, but I might build a bass first.

I'm tired of posting. That's how this tends to go.